When Pinterest is not your friend… (An open letter to my son’s new preschool teacher)

Dear Miss. Smith (not her real name because I don’t want to be totally mean and call her out even though she’ll probably find this blog and know I am speaking directly to her),

We just had a fun first week of school didn’t we? I was nervous because it was my middle child’s first week in preschool like a big boy. I think you were also nervous because I am venturing to guess this was your first week of preschool like a big girl. I’m sorry if that sounds harsh, but I don’t sleep very much these days and sometimes it makes me snippy. There were some other hints that this might be your first week teaching little kids as well. I won’t get specific because it might seem meaner than I intended to and that is not what I am going for. I would like to pass on some hard learned advice though regarding one specific “idea” you had.

Now I love Pinterest as much as the next wannabe crafty mom out there, but… There is such a thing as a bad Pinterest idea. Some would call it a “Pinterest fail”. It is my belief that you stumbled into one of those fails without even realizing it. Remember that really cute idea you had for something easy to give the kids at “meet the teacher” to get rid of their nerves about the first day? I think you’re starting to see where this is going…

Jitter. Glitter.

It was cute enough idea in theory. Something simple and easy with a little note to let them know that it is OK to be scared and also to preserve some of the magic that a four your old still possesses. A little something to let them know that you’re nervous too and a bit of a ritual between the kids and parents for the night before the big day. But here’s where you missed the mark: glitter is evil. Every parent knows it and only makes the mistake once. Maybe this was your first and last time (one can hope). As comedian Demetri Martin once famously said, “glitter is the herpes of the crafting world”.

So there we were the night before the big day and out marches my adorable four-year-old son scrubbed clean and ready for bed with his little bag of Jitter Glitter. What was I supposed to say? No? His older sister had already read the little note you attached and he thought this was the only way he was going to sleep through the night and make it to preschool fresh in the morning. Speaking of his sister, she has now entered the room and is waiting for her dusting as well. So what’s a mom to do? I take the tiniest pinch ever and sprinkle it as far above their heads as possible hoping none of it will actually hit their hair. But of course it all does. It seems to be attracted directly to them by some sort of unknown force. Of course this makes them very excited which draws my husband into the room. He immediately sees what has happened and all he can say is, “but I just washed their hair!”.

So there we are the night before the big day and my husband looks flabbergasted, my kids look like bedazzled maniacs, and I can only assume I look exhausted. But it must’ve worked because he loved his first day. And he loved his first week. That or you’re a better teacher than the Jitter Glitter first impression implied.

Also read these posts:

When Pinterest is not your friend… (An open letter to my son’s new preschool teacher)
Critical Considerations When Choosing Hospice Care at Home
4 Things About Moving That Are Just Stressful (and how to make them suck less)
An Open Letter To The People Who Want My Husband Dead
You Have to Admit, We All Do It!

For back to school tips read these:

Back to School Gifts for Preschool Teachers
Back to School Printable Lunch Box Notes for Boys
Back to School Printable Lunch Box Love Notes for Girls